|WEBABOUT.COM JOKE SHOP SUBMIT YOUR BEST AND WORSE|
JOKES & QUOTES
USA Proud ‡ Quotes ‡ Funny Pages ‡ Jokes Jokes Jokes ‡ Oldsters ‡ Politicians ‡ Southerners ‡ Rednecks
Inspiration ‡ Christmas ‡ Holidays ‡ Religion ‡ Sound Bytes ‡ Video Clips ‡ Dancing Baby ‡ Downloads ‡ Spam Blaster
I'M GLAD I'M A WOMAN
I'm glad I'm a woman, yes I am, yes I am.
I don't live off of Budweiser, Beer Nuts and Spam.
I don't brag to my buddies about my erections.
I won't drive to Hell before I ask for directions.
I don't get wasted at parties, and act like a clown.
And I know how to put that damned toilet seat down!
I won't grab your hooters, I won't pinch your butt.
My belt buckle's not hidden beneath my beer gut.
And I don't go around "re-adjusting" my crotch,
I don't belch in public, I don't scratch my behind.
I'm a woman you see-I'm just not that kind!
I'm glad I'm a woman, I'm so glad I could sing.
I don't have body hair like shag carpeting.
When I lean over you can't see 3 inches of crack.
I'm a woman, you know-I've got far too much pride!
And I honestly think its a privilege for me,
I don't live to play golf and shoot basketball.
I don't swagger and spit like a Neanderthal.
I won't tell you my wife just does not understand,
Or tell you a story to make you sigh and weep,
Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a woman, you see.
I don't long for male bonding, I don't cruise for chicks.
I'm a woman by chance and I'm thankful, it's true.
I'm so glad I'm a woman and not a man like you!
See I'm Glad I'm A Man